15 homicides aside, serious crime drops on North Side | StarTribune.com

15 homicides aside, serious crime drops on North Side | StarTribune.com

"Other than that, how was the play Mrs. Lincoln?"

Tainted dairy products seized in China - again | StarTribune.com

Tainted dairy products seized in China - again | StarTribune.com

I absolutely love it when things I complain about in my blog continue to occur.

Yes, China still sucks.

P.S. Hey China.....stop ruining Earth!!

Progressive's $3 bills....

I like how Progressive auto insurance decided to subtly appeal to the homosexual demographic.

This commercial has aired many times over the past year, so I'm sure you've seen it.

First these two guys stroll in.  Note the rainbow striping across the guy on the rights shirt.

The guy on the left is queeny, but he hasn't quite burst into flames yet.

Next, the guy on the left extends his wrist to show off the watch he obtained from his pal, completely bursting into flames and setting off the smoke alarms.

Lastly, the guy on the right learns how much money he can save by switching his insurance.  And we learn that his name is, get this, Mark F.  Mark F? 

Is that a subtle insinuation that his name is Mark Fag?  Fag being the derisive term that straights ascribe to homos, a term which they have since "reclaimed" as their own and as a source of pride.

Anyway, for whatever reason, the discreet demographic marketing at work here kinda makes me laugh.

the Oriental Tom Cruise??

Apparently, around thirty-five or so years ago, Tom Cruise's father went on a sexpedition to Bangkok, Thailand and failed to take adequate protective measures.

Witness the Asian Tom Cruise.  Looks like him.  Talks like him.  Thinks he's charming like him.  Might be a better actor.  Essentially a twin except for that pesky half-Asian DNA.

As you likely know, this guy shills insurance for State Farm.  ALL the time.

For some reason, I just think casting this guy is silly.

Cut to the board room:  "Ok, I got this guy.  Looks and acts like Tom Cruise, except he's not.  And he's kinda Asian.  But he looks like Tom Cruise."

Anyway, since I generally dislike Mr. Cruise, I have no choice but to dislike Mr. Cruise.

Do you suppose Tom is embarrassed?

Do you suppose his dad is sweating a paternity suit?

Ford guy redux

So I guess the guy in the Ford commercials that bugs me is a guy named Mike Rowe, who hosts the "Dirty Jobs" show on Discovery Channel.

Which I guess somewhat explains his appearance that I previously referred to as dirty and in desperate need of a shower.

You know the expression about being careful what you wish for?

Well, in the new spot that I saw last night, he indeed appears to have taken a shower and decided to not look so grubby.

However, and I love this part....

Having now showered, I'd recommend one of two wardrobe changes for Mike.  Either:

1] a different shirt, or

2] a sports bra, so his floppy Phil Mickelson-ish man-boobs don't continue to reduce me to laughter.


Coming soon: a rip on Mark F. and his queeny, blatantly flaming, partner in the Progressive auto insurance commercial.